Emotions

Right now I am going through so many emotions. I sit here and cry and cry and cry. The next minute I am fine. Next minute I am sitting here and wishing he would fucking choke. I don't know why I am hating him so much. I guess its my way of dealing with things. I have made a appointment with a counsellor. It was something I had to do anyways.
I found out that he had deleted his profile on a site we chatted on. One of the women I work with told me to rejoin so I did. I actually chatted with someone I had chatted to before I had met the man that I love. I gave up chatting when I met the man I love because he was all I needed. So talking to a man in a normal conversation was nice, although I did go on about the failure of this relationship. I told him I didn't remember talking to him and I don't but he was a nice man and he said that was OK. Weird to talk to someone again, and there was nothing sexual or anything which is what i don't want.
Wish my emotional state would calm down although its early days yet. You can't get over a broken heart over night. Its going to take a long long time.